The New Neighbor Theorem
by Tsukino Aisuru - A
Summary: How does everyone react when a 16 year old female theoretical physicist and her elder romance novelist sister move into the apartment just below Penny's, they're both gamers and nerds, Raj falls in love with the novelist and the 16 year old got her Ph.D before even Sheldon?


"Be CAREFUL with that!" I shouted frantically, barely helping the stupid moving guy from dropping a medium-sized box labeled "FRAGILE" on all sides in very large writing. "Can't you read the words on the freaking box?! Maybe _this_ knowledge will make you be more careful - drop that box and not only will it ALL break, the items in that box are worth more than you've earned in your entire LIFE, YOU'LL pay the price for them, AND they have a 66% chance of blowing up!"

My auburn-haired sister smiled. "I'd like to tell you that she's exaggerating, but she's not."

The guy visibly paled and got a tighter grip on my box. I moved out of the way and he commenced up the stairs - _very_ carefully.

Several minutes later, the guys were apparently planning on leaving.

"Oh, no you don't!" I got in their way. "You didn't bring the furniture or that big box up!"

"Ma'am, our work day is over." The guy shrugged.

"Um, it says in the contract you _have_ to." My sister replied smoothly, holding said contract up. The guys muttered curses and began to finish bringing our stuff up. "I would also continue being careful bringing the stuff up; even _I_ don't know where she stores her - _ah hem_ - _items_, and I don't want anybody blowing up or getting sick." The moving men were visibly even _more_ careful. I smirked in self-satisfaction. I then heard two people clearing their throats behind me. I blinked and turned.

"Oh, sorry!" I blushed, moving out of the way of the five people (four guys and one blonde girl) who had been standing behind me, obviously wanting to enter.

"Are you our new neighbors? Is there anything we can do to help?" A particularly short fellow with glasses asked as they entered.

"His offer of assistance in no way included me. My name is Sheldon Cooper. I'm a physicist, not a mover." A particularly _tall_ fellow piped in at this point. I rose my eyebrows, then feigned shock and awe.

"OHMYGOD!" I gasped, holding my hands to my heart. My green-eyed sister blinked, bewildered. "Sheldon Cooper?! You mean, THE Sheldon Cooper?!" That apparently pleased him, for he beamed.

"OH, someone who has actually recognized my great accomplishments?" He looked so happy!

I grinned wider. "So you're THE Sheldon Cooper?!"

"Indeed I am!"

"Never heard of you." I deadpanned, all expression disappearing from my face. Mr. Sheldon was now very offended. My sister face-palmed. His friends were laughing hysterically. When their laughter finally ceased, I said, "I'm Autumn Grace." I then grinned goofily, holding my hand in the Vulcan greeting sign.

"Are you the new doctor that's going to be working at the university?" The short one with glasses asked, pleasantly surprised.

I blinked several times. "You mean at Caltech?"

"Yeah."

"Indeedly doo, I am!" I saluted.

"Oh, that's so cool!" The blonde chick exclaimed, beaming.

"Might I ask you people - other than Mr. Shelly - what you are called? " I grinned. Mr. Shelly looked annoyed as the others snickered.

"Only my meemaw and my mother are allowed to call me that!" Mr. Shelly pouted. My sister then jogged over to me and bent to my ear.

"Be nice!" She whispered intensely. I grinned.

"Aw!" I pouted in turn. She jogged back to the movers and continued telling them where to put things.

"Hi, sweetie. My name is Penny - I think you're moving into the apartment just below mine." The blonde chick smiled sweetly, shaking my hand. I grinned.

"Don't be disturbed by any sudden loud bangs or cusses. Oh, or if I start screaming happily, my sister yells at me, or I start swearing and complaining loudly about how stupid noobs on WoW can't tank, heal, or DPS, or pull mobs and aren't the tank, or _are_ the tank and they don't notice when my mana's low, or when I SAY my mana's low and they don't look at the chat, or - well, I think you get it. Oh, or when I laugh loudly and say how some players on Halo 3 are getting owned by me, et cetera. Or if I sing loudly." I listed. Penny smiled hugely.

"Are you _good_ at Halo? Because _Sheldon_ here just _loves_ playing Halo with girls." Penny smirked.

I rose an eyebrow, smirking as well. "Sweetie, I _did_ just say people get owned by me, did I not? If _Sheldon_ here likes getting _owned_ by girls, I suggest he plays with me." Ignoring his dirty look and the grins, I continued. "So, anyone _else_ gonna introduce themselves?"

"Oh, I'm Leonard Hofstadter." The rather short fellow with glasses introduced and we shook hands.

I looked at the other short guy without glasses who was giving me an... _odd_ look (giving me bug eyes, mouth slightly parted, perverted look on his face, et cetera) and scooted away slightly. The dude looked pretty confused.

Penny smiled at me and pat my shoulder. "That's okay, honey, he makes us all feel that way." I chuckled.

My sister chose that moment to walk back. "Alright, the movers finally finished and didn't break anything."

"Yay!" I cheered. I then pointed at Sheldon. "That's Sheldon Cooper." I pointed at Penny. "That's Penny." I pointed at Leonard. "That's Leonard Hofstadter." I then shrugged. "I don't know the others' names yet."

"Oookay, hi~..." She greeted unenthusiastically, tired from moving. "I'm Marissa Grace."

"I'm Howard Wolowitz. It's nice to meet you two young ladies." The other short guy greeted, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Marissa basically brushed him off.

"Okay, introduce us to your friend there." She indicated the Indian guy who suddenly looked _very_ nervous.

"Oh, that's Raj. He doesn't talk much, he's kinda shy." Penny interjected.

"It's so nice to meet you. Do you all live here in the building?" Marissa asked.

"Yeah, I think I live above you." Penny nodded.

"Sheldon and I live right across from Penny." Leonard added.

Raj whispered something in Howard's ear. "Yeah, I know, I was gonna say that!" Howard replied, sounding annoyed. "Raj and I don't live here, we're just Leonard and Sheldon's friends so we hang out here a lot."

"That's cool." She nodded.

"So if you two beautiful ladies want me to _help_ to with anything, I'm _very_ good with moving. I have some particular moves I'd like to show you..." He let it trail off, giving me in particular a suggestive look.

Marissa then cleared her throat and gave him a death glare, stating more than asking, "You _are_ aware, of course, that she is is jailbait?"

Howard's eyes widened astronomically, and he immediately backed off, saying, "Whooa, boy, I didn't mean it like that!"

"What did she mean by that?" I barely heard Sheldon whispering to Leonard.

Leonard groaned. "Not now, Sheldon, this is getting good!" He was grinning like an idiot.

"She's only _sixteen_, you _know_ that, right?" Marissa continued, still glaring.

"Oh, of course, of- SIXTEEN?!" He backed up. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry..."

Leonard snorted. "Yeah, _you're sorry_ cause she's underage."

I burst out laughing.

"Well, we're having pizza tonight. Anyone want to join us?" Marissa offered.

"Or help me hook up our computers and Xbox Live?" I let the suggestion hang in the air.

"Well, we'd love to join you for pizza and help hook up your stuff, _wouldn't we, Sheldon_?" Leonard almost growled the last part, the meaning clear in his voice.

"But last time we did this, we ended up with _her_!" Sheldon whined, nodding towards Penny.

"_Yes_, and wasn't that wonderful?" Leonard glared.

Sheldon intook a breath sharply. "Only if wonderful is people sitting in your spot, messing up laundry night, stealing your wi-fi-"

"BAHAHA!" I burst out laughing. "You steal their wi-fi? High five!" I held up my hand. She laughed and high-fived me. "How 'bout we do that, too?"

"No, darling, we have our _own_ wi-fi." Marissa contradicted.

"Aww." I pouted, grinning.

"Well, looky there, people who pay their own bills." He gave Penny a look. She rolled her eyes.

"I'll hack into it anyway." I shrugged. He whipped his head around and gave me a shocked look. My sister face-palmed and shook her head at me. I then looked at my watch. "CRAP! I'm gonna be late for raiding Stormwind if I don't hook up my computer and Internet soon!"

"Language!" Marissa scolded. I glared shortly at her.

"YOU'RE gonna be late, too!"

"CRAP."

"Language." I replied sarcastically.

"Okay, you got me." She sighed.

"Well, why don't I go help hook it up?" Leonard offered.

"Well, we can't let _that_ happen, let's go!" Howard grinned.

"It's all the mover's fault!" I whined, running up the stairs. "I thought they'd be faster than that! My entire guild is relying on me- MARISSA, THE DOOR'S LOCKED."

"Oops. Oh, well." She slowly walked up the stairs. I deadpanned as she, about two minutes later, came up and unlocked the door.

"Well, I'm going upstairs." Sheldon grumbled, continuing up the stairs.

"Me, too, see you later!" Penny grinned, going upstairs. Marissa and I waved.

"Seeya!"

We went inside to the office.

Leonard, Howard and Raj gaped at the boxes obviously containing the monitors.

"Niiiiiice..." Raj blurted.

Everyone turned to look at him. His eyes widened and he covered his mouth, looking around nervously. I grinned.

"Thanks!" I saluted.

"Well, gotta have our priorities straight!" Marissa grinned hugely.

My sister then stood to the side, not having any talent whatsoever with electronics except basically how to play games on it and writing books on them.

I grabbed the first box and opened it up, pulling out the very bubble-wrapped 60 inch T.V. screen.

"Those are _huuuuge_!" Leonard exclaimed. I saluted once more.

"The computers are over there." I pointed, taking out the wires we'd be using.

"Sweet mother of Jesus!" Howard exclaimed several moments later, having opened it and seen what it was. I grinned hugely. "It's an Alienware Area 51 ALX!" I grinned wider. "You have the computer I've always wanted..."

Marissa chuckled. "Like I said, _priorities_."

He slowly picked the first one out of its box. "I can't believe I'm actually touching this..."

"I'd just like to play on it... once..." Leonard whispered.

"You can, sometime." Marissa smiled.

"What about me?" Howard asked hopefully.

"I'll think about it."

"Yes!" He hissed. Raj then whispered something in Howard's ear. "Aw, you're just gonna wanna _buy_ it after you play it!"

"Yes, Raj, you can play on it, too." Marissa smiled.

Raj then whispered something in Howard's ear again. He sighed. "Yes, maybe she likes you." My sister laughed. I walked over with the wires.

"Okay, this is for the first one." I put them down. "The first monitor is going there-" I pointed to one area of the wall. "- so I'll just set up what's holding it there."

Howard nodded. "Okay, so it's gonna be hooked up to that outlet?" He pointed and I nodded.

"I've got some power strips in that box if you need any." I pointed to a box just outside the door. "There's also an instruction manual in each box if you need those, too."

"Okay." This time Leonard replied. Both monitors and computers had been taken out by now.

"Jeez, how'd you _afford_ all of this?" Howard exclaimed.

"Keh, it's the only thing my sister's willing to spend so much of the dough on!" I snorted, moving on to the place to hook up the next monitor. The boys began putting up the first monitor, having hooked everything necessary up to it.

"Would you like a soda or anything?" Marissa offered, breaking the awkward silence.

"Um, sure, can I have a diet coke if you have any?" Leonard asked.

"Can I have some water?" Howard asked. Raj whispered in his ear. "And Raj?"

"Sure, Howard and Raj, and Leonard, you're in luck. Diet's the only thing Miss Ph.D over there drinks." And she promptly left me alone in the gaping that ensued.

"..." Howard stared, shocked. "... _You_ got a Ph.D.?"

"I got my first Ph.D last year in physics." I nodded. "Do you have one?"

"Well, no..." He muttered as the giggling Raj whispered something in Leonard's ear. "What did he say?" Howard almost groaned.

Leonard sighed. "Nevermind, Howard. You don't wanna know."

"Just tell me." He groaned.

"Raj said that by the time she's your age she'll have three and _you'll still have none_." Leonard muttered the last part.

"Ha ha _ha_, Raj."

"Well, neither does my sister. You should get one; they're really nice to have. I keep trying to tell Marissa, but she doesn't want to. She says it's a waste of time for her since she doesn't need one to write romances." I interrupted all in one breath.

"Is that what she does? She writes romances?" Howard asked.

"Yeah, her most famous series is _The Love Bites_." I informed. "Y'know, that vampire series."

Marissa promptly walked with the soda and waters. "Autumn, _guys_ don't read that series!"

"Are you _kidding_? I _LOVE_ that series!" Howard exclaimed, then whispered something to Raj, which made him laugh.

"What's so funny?" Marissa asked, her eyebrows furrowing.

"I was just telling Raj that some parts are _really_ descriptive." Howard grinned, ducking down his face a little bit.

"No, he said it was really dirty." Leonard almost deadpanned.

Marissa burst out laughing, handing out the drinks. "Glad to see you noticed." She said matter-of-factly to Howard. "Betcha liked _those_ parts."

He then whispered something in Raj's ear.

"Howard!" Leonard almost whined.

The first computer was now up and running, and Leonard began to get the Internet up. I walked over to help him, seeing as though everything else I could do was done and he needed passwords, et cetera. Hearing moving furniture, I turned to see Marissa shoving the first La-Z Boy (which was black, indicating it was mine) around to in front of where one of the monitors would go.

"Uh, Autumn." She stopped mid-push. "You can help, y'know."

I pouted, getting up and going to get the table that would go between our La-Z Boys. I hefted it up and put it next to where my sister had put my La-Z Boy. "So, what are _you_ three doing today?"

"Just playing WoW. We're going on some raid, too, but I don't remember which." Leonard shrugged, now done with the first computer and helping Howard with the Internet to the second.

"Oh, you play, too? What realm and faction do you prefer?" I asked, tugging the blue La-Z Boy.

"Oh, we have toons on both factions, but tonight we're going on our Horde toons - those are on Blackwater Raiders." Leonard shrugged.

"YES, that is OUR Horde realm!" I whooped.

"It is? Oh, okay, that's cool." Marissa replied, the fact that she did _not_ care whatsoever showing on her face.

"Oh, really?" He glanced over his shoulder, grinning slightly. "Maybe we can quest or something sometime."

I shrugged. "I guess."

"Sure, let me know when you're on; any of you!" She smiled brightly.

"If you give me your emails, I'll send you a Real ID friends request." I shrugged, surveying our now-completed gaming room.

"That'll be fine." Leonard nodded and smiled.

"NOTEPAAAAD!" I called. "Where are yooou?" I walked out to find it. I paused and frowned at the mass of boxes. "Marissa, which one is my notepad in?" I called into the room.

"The smallest one with your name on it!" She called back.

"Found it!" I ran back in with the notepad and the pen I had long since attached to it. "Write down your emails and we'll add you."

"Okay." Leonard was the first to take it and write down his name as Marissa began moving her boxes into her room. After a minute or two, they all had written down their emails and were ready to go. I stood by the door as they passed through. As the last one was passing through, I thought heard Leonard ask suddenly, "Hey, aren't _we_ raiding Stormwind today?" The door closed and I shrugged.

"Whatever."


End file.
